If we keep the commandments because of social pressure in one group setting, what happens when our audience demands bad behavior in another? If audience approval is our guiding star, we will wander and lose our way.
Jesus addressed the issue of His audience’s expectations:
“And when the messengers of John were departed, he began to speak unto the people concerning John, What went you out into the wilderness for to see? A reed shaken with the wind?
“But what went ye out for to see? A man clothed in soft raiment? Behold, they which are gorgeously apparelled, and live delicately, are in kings’ courts.
“But what went you out for to see? A prophet? Yea, I say unto you, and much more than a prophet…
“…For I say unto you, Among those that are born of women there is not a greater prophet than John the Baptist: but he that is least in the kingdom of God is greater than he…
“…And the Lord said, Whereunto then shall I liken the men of this generation? and to what are they like?
“They are like unto children sitting in the marketplace, and calling one to another, and saying, We have piped unto you, and ye have not danced; we have mourned to you, and ye have not wept.
“For John the Baptist came neither eating bread nor drink wine; and ye say, He hath a devil.
“The Son of man is come eating and drinking; and ye say, Behold a gluttonous man, and a winebibber, a friend of publicans and sinners!” (Luke 7:24-28, 31-33).
The people of Jesus’ day expected contradictory things of God’s messengers. They accused John of having a devil because of his poor raiment, living in the desert, eating locusts and wild honey, etc. But they accused Jesus of being a drunk glutton because he exhibited no such abstemious behaviors as John.
The people of Jesus’ day also expected Him to be a military Messiah, to overthrow the Roman occupation in the Holy Land; in this, they were disappointed again. (Judas, a “zealot,” probably included Jesus’ unwillingness to use His power to overthrow the Romans as a chief cause for his betrayal of his Master.)
Modern Expectations
What do we expect of prophets and Church leaders today?
As in the days of Jesus, it is impossible and unwise to attempt to please everyone. Do we fast and wear camel hair in the wilderness, or eat and drink with penitent sinners in cities? Someone would be disappointed no matter what.
How fortunate that the leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are more concerned about pleasing and serving God than pleasing and serving a fickle audience (of members and non-members alike).
My pancreas stopped making insulin over a decade ago. On various occasions, I have been offered sugary junk food by priesthood leaders, including Bishops, members of Stake Presidencies, and even a General Authority.
Where they then false leaders? Are they not in tune enough to know by revelation that such foods are bad for me? Or should I grow up and take care of my own personal needs? I chose the latter option, still believing firmly in the divine inspiration that put each of those men in his position holding priesthood keys and authority over me.
Social winds swirl (as they always have). Morality is becoming more and more a thing of fads. Yet those who enforce the current moral fads (whatever they happen to be) are getting more aggressive, as though they had some kind of authority to force others to act and believe a certain way. Shaming, blacklisting, petitioning to get people fired, are becoming more and more common as means of silencing vocal opposition to current social trends.
And so it is not the absence of virtue, but its confused misapplication, that drives persecution today.
“They shall put you out of the synagogues: yea, the time cometh, that whosoever killeth you will think that he doeth God service” (John 16:3). Self-righteousness will be the mainspring of persecution in the last days, not the will to be deliberately evil. People who are convinced that they are on the moral high-ground, whether in or out of the Church, are becoming its most vocal opponents and most vitriolic attackers.
Curtailing Confusion
Inaccurate information leads to inaccurate beliefs, which beget unrealistic expectations. Unmet or disappointed expectations result in sad and offended feelings. Offended people leave the Church more readily. Therefore it is a good idea to get as much information—correct doctrine—into the minds of members as quickly as possible.
It is impossible to know everything; some members of the Church go their whole lives unaware of various events recorded in the scriptures they have packed to Church every Sunday since they were kids. Faith is the only thing fluid enough to cover those gaps as questions arise and knowledge is sought.
Rather than focus on things about the Church that trouble some, below I would like to outline some false expectations I see that befuddle too many. This list is mine; it is by no means comprehensive or written in stone (minus the scriptures I use to elaborate my points). But I believe that extinguishing these erroneous expectations while reading a tiny blog written by an obscure member of the Church is better than having these bubbles popped in public, where humiliation often compounds disappointment and foments anger.
1. My Personal Revelation is Incumbent upon Others
Many members seem to feel their personal revelations are binding upon others.
Our personal revelations are just that—personal. Even if personal revelation is true, unless we have legitimate stewardship over others, they are not bound to believe, follow, or adhere to our pronouncements of what God tells us privately.
Lorenzo Snow received personal revelation, on his mission: “As man is, God once was; as God is, man may become.” But he kept this revolutionary insight to himself. Later on, Joseph Smith, the Lord’s prophet and mouthpiece on the earth at the time, elaborated on this idea in detail in the King Follet Discourse. It is still probably the most controversial thing he ever taught.
But my point here is that Lorenzo Snow did not rush out in public and begin teaching this new doctrine, even though it came to him via personal revelation, and was 100% correct.
How do we graduate from milk to meat? This happens largely on our own time, by our own studies, due to our own faithful fulfilling of callings and Temple attendance and continuous covenant keeping. The basics lay a broad, sturdy foundation on which to build to higher levels of study.
I feel prompted to keep some of what I consider to be my greatest spiritual insights to myself; who knows what damage they could do to an unprepared hearer?
We cannot rightly expect to look normal to others while following the promptings of the Spirit. Even good members of the Church might rebuke us for doing God’s actual, specific will for us; we should be ready to offend or confuse others (if necessary) when following the promptings of the Spirit. God is our real audience.
Worse, what of false revelations or misunderstandings? Forcing two puzzle pieces together when they do not fit creates a skewed picture; the same thing happens to a mental picture of the plan of salvation when one false idea is accepted. Such skewed mental maps produce false ideas; those who carry them will then find frustration and balk when confronted with correct information.
(It is a good practice, before accepting anything as truth, to find several passages of scripture confirming a concept.)
2. “I Already Know That.”
There are layers of understanding; just because we have some correct information does not mean we have all information on a subject. Continually study the basics; they yield new insights over time, like grape vines that yield a new crop annually (especially when we view them through the lens of today’s experiences).
3. Cuddly God and Milk-Toast Savior
This might be the sorest point for some members—I read people’s comments on blogs, saying things like, “The Heavenly Father I know would never…”
“Our heavenly father is more liberal in his views, and boundless in his mercies and blessings, than we are ready to believe or receive, and at the same time is as terrible to the workers of iniquity, more awful in the executions of his punishments, and more ready to detect every false way than we are apt to suppose him to be” (Joseph Smith, The Personal Writings of Joseph Smith, compiled by Dean C. Jessee, p. 509).
God is God. That means that He is responsible to ensure that justice is inflicted in the end. Extreme measures (the Atonement) were enacted to provide us the opportunity to repent. But the scripture assures us that those who do not take that proffered escape route will “suffer even as [Jesus]” (D&C 19:17). “Weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth,” are a future reality many deny in order to dilute God to a concentration they find insipidly sweet and palatable.
4. Obedience Leads to Ease
Doing the right thing can ease burdens, and sometimes incur them. Lehi’s dream of the Tree of Life is familiar because of its vivid imagery, but we often neglect the first few verses:
“…methought I saw in my dream, a dark and dreary wilderness.
“And it came to pass that I saw a man, and he was dressed in a white robe; and he came and stood before me.
“And it came to pass that he spake unto me, and bade me follow him.
“And it came to pass that as I followed him I beheld myself that I was in a dark and dreary waste” (1Ne. 8:4-7).
Following the Savior can often lead us into (and out of) troubles. His was no comfortable path; how will those that follow Him not feel some encroaching darkness and difficulty, too? We might have to take a pay cut, lose friends, lose opportunities, and make other sacrifices, in order to keep following the Savior.
5. God Builds Self-Esteem
“…I will show unto them their weakness…” (Ether 12:27). This is not a self-esteem party.
The world prefers its happiness served in the form of praise. God gives happiness in the form of blessing obedient and penitent children, especially with an added measure of His Spirit. This is a better source of happiness, since it is not shifting and unreliable like praise from our peers.
King Benjamin includes awareness of our own “nothingness” as part of a formula for permanent happiness:
“…remember, and always retain in remembrance, the greatness of God, and your own nothingness…
“…if ye do this ye shall always rejoice…” (Mosiah 4:11-12). The source of this joy is increased faith and a greater portion of the Spirit, NOT an infusion of a sense of how wonderful and valuable we are.
A diamond in the rough is still rough. We are of infinite worth; it is just as true that we are fallen and flawed. We can leave to God the task of estimating our worth, and enjoy instead the sweet feelings of His Holy Spirit.
6. Perfection Here and Now
I frequently hear Church members state that the purpose of the Gospel is to become like God. While this is true, they mistakenly assume that we perfect ourselves, and that it happens in this life. Flawlessness will only happen AFTER we are resurrected. And it is almost all God’s job: “…this is MY work and MY glory—to bring to pass the immortality (living forever in perfect health and form) and eternal life (having a fullness of joy, knowledge, virtues, etc.) of man (that’s us).
He has actually left us riddled with flaws (“I give unto men weakness”) and we will have many of them still intact at the moment we die. He gives us weakness to make us humble, which is more important to our salvation than being flawless (for now).
What is our work, then?
“Behold, this is your work, to keep my commandments, yea, with all your might, mind and strength” (D&C 11:20).
Are we not commanded to “be perfect?” In the scriptures this does not mean “flawless.” It means to keep the whole law—whatever rules are given to us. And the written rules will not serve us well unless they are coupled with daily spiritual promptings about what to repent of, and whom to serve.
Laman and Lemuel thought the murderous Jerusalemites of their day were righteous because they kept the written law; Lehi and Nephi thought of the spiritual promptings they received as their commandments.
Can you imagine Nephi loitering at Jerusalem, reading self-help books and trying to perfect himself for eight years until Babylon sacked the city, instead of taking the wretched man that he (supposed he) was and accomplishing the things which the Lord had commanded him? Church members often delay duties they feel can only be done after they achieve a flawless state (which state will not even exist until after the resurrection).
Regardless of our flaws, inadequacies, and wretchedness, we are to follow the promptings of the Spirit, like Nephi, and do the work assigned to us by the Lord, despite our warts (of all kinds).
I detest fault-finding and negativity, but false ideas creeping into and souring the Lord’s vineyard are even more reprehensible to me. My attempt here is to point out a few things I see as obstacles to keeping the actual commandments we are given, instead of being decoyed away by substitute rules and aims.
When living the Gospel becomes burdensome all the time, perpetually joyless, it is a sign that we are doing something wrong. Expect is still a verb, and internal actions should be aligned with truth, not just our outward actions.
How do we graduate from milk to meat? This happens largely on our own time, by our own studies, due to our own faithful fulfilling of callings and Temple attendance and continuous covenant keeping. The basics lay a broad, sturdy foundation on which to build to higher levels of study.
I feel prompted to keep some of what I consider to be my greatest spiritual insights to myself; who knows what damage they could do to an unprepared hearer?
We cannot rightly expect to look normal to others while following the promptings of the Spirit. Even good members of the Church might rebuke us for doing God’s actual, specific will for us; we should be ready to offend or confuse others (if necessary) when following the promptings of the Spirit. God is our real audience.
Worse, what of false revelations or misunderstandings? Forcing two puzzle pieces together when they do not fit creates a skewed picture; the same thing happens to a mental picture of the plan of salvation when one false idea is accepted. Such skewed mental maps produce false ideas; those who carry them will then find frustration and balk when confronted with correct information.
(It is a good practice, before accepting anything as truth, to find several passages of scripture confirming a concept.)
2. “I Already Know That.”
There are layers of understanding; just because we have some correct information does not mean we have all information on a subject. Continually study the basics; they yield new insights over time, like grape vines that yield a new crop annually (especially when we view them through the lens of today’s experiences).
3. Cuddly God and Milk-Toast Savior
This might be the sorest point for some members—I read people’s comments on blogs, saying things like, “The Heavenly Father I know would never…”
“Our heavenly father is more liberal in his views, and boundless in his mercies and blessings, than we are ready to believe or receive, and at the same time is as terrible to the workers of iniquity, more awful in the executions of his punishments, and more ready to detect every false way than we are apt to suppose him to be” (Joseph Smith, The Personal Writings of Joseph Smith, compiled by Dean C. Jessee, p. 509).
God is God. That means that He is responsible to ensure that justice is inflicted in the end. Extreme measures (the Atonement) were enacted to provide us the opportunity to repent. But the scripture assures us that those who do not take that proffered escape route will “suffer even as [Jesus]” (D&C 19:17). “Weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth,” are a future reality many deny in order to dilute God to a concentration they find insipidly sweet and palatable.
4. Obedience Leads to Ease
Doing the right thing can ease burdens, and sometimes incur them. Lehi’s dream of the Tree of Life is familiar because of its vivid imagery, but we often neglect the first few verses:
“…methought I saw in my dream, a dark and dreary wilderness.
“And it came to pass that I saw a man, and he was dressed in a white robe; and he came and stood before me.
“And it came to pass that he spake unto me, and bade me follow him.
“And it came to pass that as I followed him I beheld myself that I was in a dark and dreary waste” (1Ne. 8:4-7).
Following the Savior can often lead us into (and out of) troubles. His was no comfortable path; how will those that follow Him not feel some encroaching darkness and difficulty, too? We might have to take a pay cut, lose friends, lose opportunities, and make other sacrifices, in order to keep following the Savior.
5. God Builds Self-Esteem
“…I will show unto them their weakness…” (Ether 12:27). This is not a self-esteem party.
The world prefers its happiness served in the form of praise. God gives happiness in the form of blessing obedient and penitent children, especially with an added measure of His Spirit. This is a better source of happiness, since it is not shifting and unreliable like praise from our peers.
King Benjamin includes awareness of our own “nothingness” as part of a formula for permanent happiness:
“…remember, and always retain in remembrance, the greatness of God, and your own nothingness…
“…if ye do this ye shall always rejoice…” (Mosiah 4:11-12). The source of this joy is increased faith and a greater portion of the Spirit, NOT an infusion of a sense of how wonderful and valuable we are.
A diamond in the rough is still rough. We are of infinite worth; it is just as true that we are fallen and flawed. We can leave to God the task of estimating our worth, and enjoy instead the sweet feelings of His Holy Spirit.
6. Perfection Here and Now
I frequently hear Church members state that the purpose of the Gospel is to become like God. While this is true, they mistakenly assume that we perfect ourselves, and that it happens in this life. Flawlessness will only happen AFTER we are resurrected. And it is almost all God’s job: “…this is MY work and MY glory—to bring to pass the immortality (living forever in perfect health and form) and eternal life (having a fullness of joy, knowledge, virtues, etc.) of man (that’s us).
He has actually left us riddled with flaws (“I give unto men weakness”) and we will have many of them still intact at the moment we die. He gives us weakness to make us humble, which is more important to our salvation than being flawless (for now).
What is our work, then?
“Behold, this is your work, to keep my commandments, yea, with all your might, mind and strength” (D&C 11:20).
Are we not commanded to “be perfect?” In the scriptures this does not mean “flawless.” It means to keep the whole law—whatever rules are given to us. And the written rules will not serve us well unless they are coupled with daily spiritual promptings about what to repent of, and whom to serve.
Laman and Lemuel thought the murderous Jerusalemites of their day were righteous because they kept the written law; Lehi and Nephi thought of the spiritual promptings they received as their commandments.
Can you imagine Nephi loitering at Jerusalem, reading self-help books and trying to perfect himself for eight years until Babylon sacked the city, instead of taking the wretched man that he (supposed he) was and accomplishing the things which the Lord had commanded him? Church members often delay duties they feel can only be done after they achieve a flawless state (which state will not even exist until after the resurrection).
Regardless of our flaws, inadequacies, and wretchedness, we are to follow the promptings of the Spirit, like Nephi, and do the work assigned to us by the Lord, despite our warts (of all kinds).
I detest fault-finding and negativity, but false ideas creeping into and souring the Lord’s vineyard are even more reprehensible to me. My attempt here is to point out a few things I see as obstacles to keeping the actual commandments we are given, instead of being decoyed away by substitute rules and aims.
When living the Gospel becomes burdensome all the time, perpetually joyless, it is a sign that we are doing something wrong. Expect is still a verb, and internal actions should be aligned with truth, not just our outward actions.
